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Family scapegoats with years of healing: what events or thoughts precipitated your full acceptance of your family's narcissistic dynamic? Can you share your inner thoughts as you reached it? How do we know when we have reached full acceptance?

09.06.2025 00:00

Family scapegoats with years of healing: what events or thoughts precipitated your full acceptance of your family's narcissistic dynamic? Can you share your inner thoughts as you reached it? How do we know when we have reached full acceptance?

The most important things to realize:

The family's “in group” do not have intimate relationships. They are transactional and look down on each other. In other words, you aren't missing anything.

They enjoy hurting you.

If I only have a fire extinguisher to defend myself against some threat from people, should I spray them for max damage or just hit them with the fire extinguishers?

Recognizing the darkness in yourself allows you to see it very clearly in others. A narcissist is consumed with darkness. That is: deceit, sadism, and ego.

You will never be enough no matter what you do. At best, they will make backhanded compliments or just ignore you.

When you recognize your own darkness, you will see it in them, and see them for who they actually are as people. Then it will become easy to drop them from your life.

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You don't owe them anything.

Your life is better in every single way without them.

You’ll know you've reached full acceptance when you receive a hoover and send it straight to spam/trash without an emotional reaction, or a second thought about it.

I'm a 27 year old male currently but I am going through going through gender dysphoria. Why do some transgender people (specifically transgender women since I see that the most) call themselves trannies or shemales? Aren't those offensive words?

In that sense, acceptance is strongly related to building awareness.

They don't love you.